Well this was a hard day. I hate cancer and hate even more that it is killing my dad. I have been upset all night and as you can see it's now after 3:00 am. I don't sleep much and this is the third time since all this that I have not gone to bed at all. I know he tries to be tough and not let me see how bad it is or how much pain he is in. I can't bear the thought of having him taken away so fast yet I hate to see him suffer. I know he looks great in our pictures of him movin' rocks but he is paying for it today. It breaks my heart, I can't even describe how bad I hate this. We are leaving for Disney World on the 11th with the Vockels. I'm so excited to take the kids and I'm scared to death that my Dad won't be here when I get back.Last week I accidentally had my radio on a country station in my car. I try not to do this because the songs seem to get the better of my emotions....(I usually stick to rap and then this doesn't happen)....anyway, on my way home from dropping the kids at school I here a song and it was just one of those things where you swear it was meant for you to hear. It's called COWGIRLS DON'T CRY by Brooks & Dunn. They really aren't my favorite but if you hear it I bet you'll think of me.
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3 comments:
I am praying for you! It sounds so cheesy, but it just doesn't seem like there is anything else to do. If I was close, I would come over and sit on the couch with you and have a drink. But somehow that doesn't seem like much at all in the big picture. Just know that I am here if you need anything. I am so so sorry you are dealing with this shit. Tracy did it first, you are next. My turn is coming. We will all have to do this. IT SUCKS!
It really is tough, and it completely sucks! I want you and your whole family to know how much Holly and I are thinking of you during this extremely difficult time. It's not easy knowing what is transpiring and going on. Cancer, Heart Attacks, Strokes, they all suck majorly!
I'll hear songs on the radio and the faucet of tears turns on and they gush out, and then it goes away. I miss my Mom tremendously, not a day goes by that I don't think of her.
We are here for you, your Mom, and your entire family. No matter what and when it happens, you will see your father again.
I wish I had the all the right things to say, but unfortunately there aren't words that can help ease the pain of knowing what is to come from the loss of someone that has such magnificent magnitude in your life. You know our thoughts and prayers are with ALL of you. We wish we could have been at the Ranch last weekend for one more bonfire, sorry we weren't able to make it but we were thinking of you all and I was waiting for you to get home and post pictures - cherished moments. Take Sandi up on the offer but leave the couch out ----Were coming to the beach, we are all due for good lasting friendship and drinks!
Love ya
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